There seems to be a dilemma among some who hold to, or at least at one time have professed a belief in, the doctrines of grace concerning the first point of the doctrine of total inability or more commonly referred to as total depravity.

            The confession has to be made that the Biblical revelation reflects human experience regarding the heart. It has been deeply affected by sin in every facet to include will, emotions and intellect. Jesus said, "For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies: 20 These are the things which defile a man: but to eat with unwashen hands defileth not a man" (Matthew 15:19-20). The apostle Paul listed the works of the flesh or the natural man: "Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, 20 Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies, 21 Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God (Galatians 5:19-21). The human heart is a cauldron of evil [injurious behavior] to self and to others. Is it any surprise then when sinners sin? It should not be.

            The dilemma comes when someone in good faith looks at another person, a sinner to use biblical language, and says to them, "I see in you greed". "I see in you willfulness". "I see in you hypocrisy". Or, they might say, "I see in you a desire for recognition". "I see in you a need to be in control". "I see in you opposition to gospel principles and practices." What happens? Oftentimes, pride is wounded and immediately a defense goes up. Charge is met with counter charge, accusation is met with aggressiveness. In the barrage of base rhetoric real issues are lost.

            Would it not be better to say, "My brother, you see greed in my heart. It has been there since birth. I see it too. Pray for me. Pray with me." "Sister, you see me hurting people, help me to be better. Tell me whom I have offended so I can go to them and apologize and ask for their forgiveness. Help me be a better person but be specific." "My friend, you see a pattern that causes a reaction to my ministry. Tell me where the gospel I have preached has not been accurate so I can change my message for the only thing I have offered people, from my perspective, are the passages and principles of the Bible which say, ?This is the way of the Lord, let us walk therein.' I have chapter and verse for all I have said and done, from my recollection, but if that is not the case be specific and help me."  I am sure a good case can be made against me. God has made His own case against each of us, and here is the divine verdict: Romans 3:10 As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one: Romans 3:23 For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God. You are no better than I. I am no better than you. You are no different than me. I am no different than you.

            Of course those making an accusation against another person do have a biblical responsibility. First, they must examine their own hearts. Matthew 7:3-5 And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye? 4 Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye? 5 Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye. Second, they have to have a different agenda which precludes the destruction of someone else or drive that individual from acts of ministry. Rather, they must seek reconciliation. After all, the accuser presumes to be the more spiritual one of the two so he [or she] has the greater responsibility. Galatians 6:1-3 Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted. 2 Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. 3 For if a man think himself to be something, when he is nothing, he deceiveth himself.  Third they are to follow a biblical pattern established by Christ in Matthew 18.

            So here is the dilemma. How can a person say the difficult things that need to be said without being a hypocrite himself or less than spiritual or violating the pattern established by Christ? How can a person hear the harsh things that are probably more true than not without being defensive? In short, who really wants to be a Christian and live out the ethics of the Christian faith? That is the dilemma. The heart of flesh moves the hand and tongue to wound and destroy another person for whom Christ has died, all the while pretending he does no wrong. The more gentle notes of the gospel are not heard nor manifested -- such as longsuffering, gentleness, seeking reconciliation, goodness and mercy with sinners. More than one person has observed that while some know the doctrine of grace they know nothing about showing the grace of the doctrine. But be of good cheer; God will continue to bring us to those places and people where we have an opportunity to "get it right".  For that reason, in part, God ordains who should come into our lives and where the pressure points should be. He wants us to have a chance to resolve the dilemma between the flesh and gospel principles.